June 1995
These changes in family structure influence who is parenting our children and pose some interesting challenges for parents of teenagers. If we look at the population of the state by age it is clear that the population from 6 years of age to 17 years of age may have peaked in 1980 with 354,444 persons in that age bracket. While the age group of 18 to 24 years of age has continued to grow. As of 1990 over 210,000 individuals were 18 to 24 years of age.
The change in family structure, the increase in single parent families, and the change in the size of teenage cohorts provides a difficult dilemma for parents. As a cohort is reduced in size society often shifts its focus to other areas of societal concerns. This may happen in the state as the teenage population decreases in number. Parents will continue to face challenges as family structure continues to evolve and their teenagers become a smaller proportion of the overall population when compared to past age groups.
Educational opportunities are available in some communities to support parents. Organizations, agencies and religious groups provide educational classes and discussion groups. Extension Educators in your county will be able to provide suggestions for involvement in local educational classes.
John C. Allen, Ph.D.
Extension Rural Sociologist
What kind of message is your child getting about perfection? Have you set very high expectations for your children--expectations that are sometimes beyond your child's physical, mental or social capabilities?
Adults who expect perfection unwittingly teach children that they are valued only for their accomplishments, and perhaps only for their "perfect" accomplishments. Children may feel worthless and that they are disappointing their parents unless they get all A's in school, are the most popular kid in their class, or receive all purple ribbons at the fair.
Adults can help kids see the vast difference between striving for excellence and trying to be perfect. Encourage kids to set realistic goals that stretch their capabilities, but that can be attained. Help kids find fun ways to work toward their goals so that their progress is a reward itself.
As you interact with kids, let them know that no one is perfect, not even you. Mistakes are sure to happen, and they are not disasters. In fact, errors provide valuable opportunities to learn new things.
When school is out children may complain about being bored. One of the best gifts to them is to encourage them to read. Reading adds depth to our lives and offers many hours of excitement and pleasure. Try these ideas to encourage reading.
All jobs require a sense of responsibility and good work habits. Showing up for work on time, following directions and avoiding unnecessary absences are characteristics of a good employee in just about any job. These also are items often mentioned in letters of recommendation.
A summer job may not fit the teen's dream of the future, but good references are needed to get the job they really want. Encourage them to look at temporary employment as a way to build up those references.
Above all, they should take each job seriously. Although it may seem unimportant to them now, someone is paying them to do a task and to do it right. If a request does seem unreasonable or unethical, then it needs to be discussed with the appropriate person. However, just leaving early, goofing off or not reporting to work because they just don't like what they're doing can lead to future problems.
Keep a record of summer jobs along with skills learned and name of person(s) to contact in the future for letters of recommendation.
Tanning lotions, salt, chlorine and perspiration can weaken a swimsuit's fabric and dull its bright colors. To prevent this, rinse the suit in fresh water immediately after swimming, then wash it as soon as possible.